5 Things To Not Expect The First Time You’ve Sex

If there was one thing that I could go back and tell my younger self, apart from the names of all the fuckbois to dodge in my lifetime, it would be all the things that I shouldn’t have expected during the first time that I had sex. You see, for a young girl whose research was only limited to watching Priyanka Chopra sizzle in the movie Aitraaz, my  expectations were to somewhat recreate the kind of symphonies that turn your neighbours deaf. The only thing however that I did end up creating was disappointment, as my first time sex came more as a shock to me than as a surprise. And it wasn’t pleasant.

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Which is why, for all of those who are yet to step into the ballgame that is sex, here are 5 things that you must not  expect from your first time, to make it more enjoyable and a lot less disappointing!

Don’t have unrealistic expectations

The most elementary mistake to make during first time sex is having unrealistic expectations about pleasure from your partner and the entire act. Chances are, you’ll end up too involved in figuring things out and confirming if it’s being done right than really enjoying yourself through the process, which at least the first time is more painful than it is fun. So step into it without expectations and make most of the moment as and how it comes.

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Don’t be too hard on yourself

Apart from it being a great pun, this comes across as very effective and important advice, especially for the first timers. Don’t beat yourself over trying to be the perfect partner in bed. It is okay to take your time and find your own pace, without acing it. After all, practice makes perfect, and for that you have plenty of time and tries left!

Don’t recreate porn

It is natural for many people to refer to porn videos right before they plan on having their big night. And while, it is good to be informed and go in with a few ideas, trying to recreate the well-directed, well-shot and totally made-up porn videos might just not be a great idea. Porn is way different than sex in real life, and it is best left to the heat of the moment than to a choreographed piece in your head.

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Don’t expect too much from your partner

Your partner, whether or not a virgin, would still be having sex with you for the first time and chances are would already be a little nervous to explore the territory. So putting the entire onus of having a great night on the partner might not be fair. Be kind and receptive to each other as opposed to expecting him to know everything that there is to know. Cut the guy some slack too!

Don’t expect an ecstatic happy ending

There are surveys that show how most women, during their first time, have only climaxed towards disappointment and not an orgasm. The first time is already tricky, with all the pain that follows suit, leaving you a little uncomfortable. So it is best to not expect to get an orgasm for the first time, and to let it be more about the journey than the destination. For now, at least.

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