Men Reveal The Little Romantic Gestures They Crave
I believe it’s been so long that I have been in a relationship with an emotionally available man that I may have just forgotten how it works. My ex was so emotionally stunted and disinterested that I had stopped doing things for him. You know partly because he didn’t care for them and partly because he put no effort either. I have a feeling whenever I am in a real relationship next (and not in a situationship), I won’t know how to be actively romantic. It’s important because there are so many romantic gestures men love and deserve.
Unfortunately, it is always expected of the men to do these things for women. Though I would like to let these men know that we don’t really get it as much as you’ll think we do. Firstly, I don’t even get a guy without commitment issues. Asking for a guy who would do these lovely things for me seems a little farfetched right now. But anyhoo, if I were to have a Ranveer Singh in life, I would have definitely not just returned but initiated the affection and romance.
Men of Reddit opened up about the little romantic gestures that they would love to receive. “What thoughtful act of romance or affection in a relationship would you love to receive or experience more of that is typically showered on women but not typically given to men,” a user asked.
To be held
“Sometimes I want to be held, or have let me lay my head on your lap and just lightly scratch my back, I want to feel nurtured too. Esp in Corona, I’m so touch starved it hurts,” a guy wrote. Men want to be held too. They may not show it as much. “I hold my bf when we sleep and scratch his back from time to time, going through his hair with my fingers, cuddle him from the back and kiss him. I just wrote him a love letter and I will bring flowers, we have 1 year anniversary today 🙂 I do the things I also would like to have, because i am sure men also want affection and romantic stuff,” a woman responded.
Be the little spoon
“Sometimes I like to be the little spoon,” a user wrote. Immediately, so many people could relate. “I’m telling my bf this! Lol I LOVE to be big spoon. Even if he’s a foot taller than me. It’s so comfy,” a woman responded. “I love being the big spoon. The last guy I dated destroyed it by saying he ‘feels like a girl’ doing it,” another femme added. We like it too! These romantic gestures are important!
“I’d say the ability to talk about problems without being seen as weaker or less attractive to your partner (provided that you’re not sobbing without good reason or just being a generally emotionally unstable person because that’s really not attractive),” a guy wrote. It’s sad that men feel they cannot express their emotions because it makes them sound weak. No, we’d really love it if our boyfriends did! “The women I date find this kind of vulnerability sexy and it makes you more human. Please know that it takes strength, not weakness, to ask for help, to open up, to be vulnerable,” a guy responded. This guy gets it right! It’s not even a romantic gesture, it’s like a basic right, hon.
“I like when my woman if I have one pats me in the butt thus I like to pat my special woman in the butt. I’m quite the butt patter on her if I have a lady,” a guy wrote. Well, when I am dating, I love doing that! Such romantic gestures are both cute and sexy!
I have heard so many men say they don’t get complimented enough. Maybe it’s true but I do like to compliment my bae, when I have one. I know how happy it makes me feel so I would want him to feel the same. “Literally any compliment will do. We don’t receive a lot of them (in general), so they really stand out. Once, just as we were headed out for the evening my wife turns to me and says, ‘Wow, you just look so cool and handsome.’ We joke about it now, but even joking about it reminds me of that time that she was smitten with me enough that she had to vocalise it,” a guy wrote.
Another guy agreed saying, “The one girl who says that I look handsome on a specific day has my heart whenever she wants it.”
I am personally surprised by just how many men wrote they would love to receive flowers. It made me realise just how we assume that it’s always the men giving women flowers. Unknowingly, we indulge in stereotypes that prescribe gender norms. Men love flowers. “As a 6’2, bearded, burly man (not as if, that matters) I would LOVE to receive flowers. I give my wife flowers on occasion (not too much though, I can’t have her expecting that all the time haha),” a guy wrote. Men love these romantic gestures too. They deserve flowers. Lillies, roses, daffodils!
“Maybe not flowers per say but if my woman wanted to surprise me on a random day, receiving my favorite chocolates or tacos would be awesome,” another user added. They do deserve these things too!
Women to actively plan dates
“I feel like in a lot of relationships it usually falls on the guy to make the relationship “interesting” or “exciting” so the girl doesn’t get bored of him. I don’t know if it usually works the way around, but it would be cool if women took some more initiative to plan dates or events or just be a bit more spontaneous. Once they’re in a relationship, some people just become too passive,” a guy wrote. Well, women must plan things and men gotta be up for trying out new things. It’s always a two-way street.
“I love spontaneous signs of affection, just a hug or a kiss out of nowhere, with no words being used and no intention of anything sexual. My personal favorite is just a random hug from behind and a kiss on the neck. It makes me feel loved and it melts my heart.”
“Lying on a bed together and some head scratches and one whisper “I love you” that would make my entire month.”
“Touched. I liked to be touched, just have her run her hands on my chest shoulders back. I like getting my neck kissed. Kiss me on the cheek. Fucking heaven.”
“Some times I want someone to pet or caress my head in a loving or affectionate way and be genuinely complimented.”
There are several ways to show affection physically and it doesn’t have to be sexual. Men love it too when you hug them out of nowhere and plant random kisses on them! Women love receiving affection and men love it too. Romantic gestures aren’t really a gender thing! It’s just that several men don’t know how to be vocal about it thanks to years of stereotyping and social conditioning. But now that we know they love it, we gotta do it more.