Here’s How Dating Changes In Your Late 20s
I was never a rash dater but back in my late teens and early 20s, my glasses were of unicorn-tint! My dealbreakers were a handful, very obvious ones – like cheating or being disrespectful. I let my heart lead the way as I interacted with potential love interests with my armour down. After a few pokes and maybe a full-fledged stab, I realised dating is nothing short of a battlefield. Oh, I was so naïve and as much as I think fondly of my innocent romances, I wouldn’t want to go back to that. Experience teaches you a lot and my love style may not be straight from rom coms but it is real and warm.
When you’re in your late 20s, and I say this at 29, dating doesn’t come so easy. Have you ever wondered why you don’t date often? Is the dating pool way worse now? My colleague-friend Mitali is 24 and she is hoping that with age the dating pool will get better. I keep reminding her that emotional intelligence is not like your alcohol permit that you will just get it after a certain age. Neither does fuckery have an age limit; fuckbois will vouch for that, some of them as old as 50!
But Mitali has a point – dating does get better in the late 20s but not because the men get any smarter. Maybe they do but the ratio of your emotional intelligence to their dumbfuckery remains the same. But here’s why it gets better. It’s because you become more equipped to handle dating as well as being single. Along with a long list of I-wish-I-had-stayed-home-that-night kinda boys, you also gather lessons that make you more aware of what you deserve. Here’s how dating changes in your late 20s.
You date less and become pickier
Our editor would like to believe that a bunch of 20-somethings, smart and independent women would be navigating the dating pool on a regular basis. So much that you can simply ask for your regular order but then going by my dating history, I would end up with either those who straight away ask me to marry them or those who disappear when I say “commi…” and poof…gone! In your late 20s, you have been there done that and you know less is more. Unless we are talking about orgasms.
You already know your dealbreakers and don’t linger for long
Earlier I used to feel hurt when things didn’t work out with someone. I still do when I have loved them. However, if I am seeing someone and I see red flags (I am so familiar with those now!), I calmly pack my bags, bid them adieu and get the fuck out. In your late 20s, you take lesser time to just know what won’t work.
You’d rather wait than settle for less
Life isn’t about finding a companion; of course, it’s better when you do have one (or more!). But why settle for someone you don’t want as much? Wait for the top apple and until then be single, be a hoe, be whoever you want to be!
Superficial things don’t impress you
No, we don’t care if his face looks like it’s meant to be kissed all over, if his hair makes you feel weak in the knees or he is an avid traveler. If he has the emotional intelligence of a wall, warmth of Santa’s business center, and mansplains you like you are a 5-year-old, he can take his million-dollar looks and his trekking gear to hell.
You’re vacillating between losing faith in dating and fantasising about marriage
I am not very optimistic about the dating pool and men. To be honest, Indian men have no flirting game and when you find some with deflated egos, they are rare. Just when I am losing faith though, I remind myself that there are guys who are worth it. And when I hear sweet stories of my married friends, I feel like getting married too. Of course, then these couples fight and make me want to not marry. Damn, shaadi ka ladoo is hella confusing!
Your expectations are more realistic
No, there are no soulmates. You won’t find a custom-made Mr. Perfect who will be able to read every thought in your head. You have to say it! Communication will make your relationship better. It’s DIY meal honey, you can’t order it from Swiggy!
You don’t care about “impressing” them
I had a crush on someone way older than me when I was younger. Omg, the lamest ways I used to impress him. The way I pretended to be more mature and like all the things older people like and all that. Today, I am like fuck you, this is me, take it or leave it. If I am not myself, they won’t like me for me. And when you love yourself, why do you wanna be anyone else?