Going For An Arranged Marriage Meeting? Here’s What You Should Notice To Know If He’s Husband Material
A lot of people are scared of marriage – arranged or otherwise- but especially when its arranged, even as your parents sit on the computer. They’re browsing through profiles on matrimonial portals, and your heart is sinking with fear. I am one of those people; I get cold feet even when I am only attending a wedding! And let me tell you, I used to be the exact opposite. I loved the concept of marriage and I had even dreamt of a beach wedding, the kind of outfit I’d wear, etc. And then I grew up and saw things in a realistic way. The thing that scares us more is the uncertainty, the unknown. You feel like it’s a gamble and you can never really know someone enough before saying yes. So you have to play your cards well and learn to get into the personality, mindset and nature of your potential suitors like a pro and then just wing it. How do you do it without a psychology degree? Well, the next time you meet someone, notice these things about them. It will help you understand them beyond their words.
How he interacts with the waiter
Several websites and portals will tell you this is the key, and it truly is. A humble man will always treat every human with respect irrespective of their status or profession. Pay heed to how he behaves with the servers and security guards. Does he order them around? Does he leave the table in a mess for them to clean? Does he act like a king and insist on being served? If he’s rude to them, even if not in an obvious way, but with his reactions (he’s extremely annoyed if they are even a little sloppy) or with his gestures – pointing or using his fingers to talk to them, you might not want to spend a lifetime with this guy.
His attention span
Who wants a partner who is not attentive? I am sure there are no takers for that. Observe if he keeps his phone aside when with you. Talking to someone who is constantly immersed in his phone is quite dull and it really speaks about how ill-mannered that person is. More importantly, pay attention to where his eyes are at. Is he looking at your eyes? Looking into the distance so you’re likely a background noise to him? Maybe he’s checking his watch. He’s more interesting in other things, girl. While you’re on your honeymoon, he will most probably be busy on Instagram posting live updates.
How fussy he is with things
If he is too picky about what he eats and probably even complains about the food, he is likely to be unsatisfied about everything in life. Unless, of course, the food is genuinely bad. And even then, the way he communicates this will be an important indicator. Does he joke about it? (Interesting, he could be a fun guy) Or is he dismissive? (He has no taste buds?) Also, they say people who are fussy aren’t good in bed because they tend to get too restrictive. Run, run, for your sex life!
Does he mansplain?
If he acts like he knows everything a tad bit better than you, he is probably a very proud to be an owner of a penis – his contribution to this being nothing. Does he cut you off and explain the most obvious concepts to you like you know nothing? Eww, mansplainer alert! Cut him off and explain to him why he needs to put that attitude away.
If he is a good listener
When you’re married, you want to be able to tell each other everything. You would want to come home from work talk about so many things – your annoying manager, the funny things that happened, the project you’re excited about, etc. Now imagine him losing interest 5 minutes into that conversation. It’s good to watch out for this behaviour at this stage itself. You want him to ask questions, and he probably will if he’s genuinely interested.
Does he respect your choices?
You said you want to go to a coffee shop, but he insisted on meeting for lunch and movie. He even dismissed when you said you want to go home by 5. If he doesn’t respect your choices, will he after he has you as wife? This is the courtship period, and even if you aren’t dating, you want him to respect what you think about certain things and issues. If he orders for you, without even presenting a menu, do away with him like you would a discarded receipt.
Pay attention to the kind of things he talks about
Someone who values emotions, will talk about his life in terms of family, friends, childhood and feelings. Someone who values materialistic things will talk about his job, assets and find ways to flaunt his luxuries and spends. Also, see how much he markets himself. No we don’t need a narcissistic husband.