5 Reasons Millennials Are Afraid Of Saying ‘I Love You’ And Take An Eternity To Do It
I am 28 so I have been in both eras – when relationships were a bit cheesier to now when dating seems as detached as we are. And what’s my verdict? Modern dating is tough! There, I said it. When I was 17 and had my first boyfriend, we said ‘I love you’ within a month of dousing each other with affection. And saying those words never came with ifs and buts. It was always followed with getting in a relationship that we intended to last.
But here we are today, not wanting to say ‘I love you’ months and months after talking to each other. Relationships today are like Voldemort in Harry Potter movies – people refuse to name them. We will say we love spending time them, we care for them, we love everything about them but dare not say we love them. According to a research, millennials are taking longer to declare their love and I believe it’s time we reflect on this. We need to figure what are the reasons for this trend and eliminate the wrong ones out. Here are 5 reasons I believe we millennials are too afraid to say ‘I love you’.
1) It might just be a lot of attraction
Okay, so honestly, I don’t even know if I was in love or not with some of the guys I felt I was in love with. We often mistake good chemistry and attachment with love. I mean, once I am over them, I really feel grateful things didn’t work out because I was probably not really in love and he was a fuckboi I wouldn’t have gotten along with. Yes, brutal but true.
2) We may not be ready for commitment
You can’t just declare your love and be like nonchalant afterward. And if the other person loves you back, are you really ready to commit? It’s scary and we keep procrastinating till we’re ready – which never really happens so we just embrace our singlehood and then complain of having no one to celebrate the holidays with.
3) We are afraid of rejection
How do we figure if they are simply afraid of saying ‘I love you’ or they just don’t? We don’t even know what all that affection is. Is this just casual or are we on the path to something meaningful? Rejection is hurtful and we don’t want to face it.
4) We don’t know if it’s too soon
The entire dating pool rn is like tiptoeing their way around love and beating around the bush. Even asking where this is going feels like a crime at times. So we get really afraid of saying it too soon because it might just scare them off and ruin the chance of a relationship. Someone needs to define “too soon” though, once and for all for better clarity.
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5) It calls for action, which may not always be in our favour
We know dropping this love bomb comes with its consequences. And sure if you want a relationship and he does too, things can lead to a positive start. But imagine if one of you isn’t ready to commit. Or worse, they don’t want anything serious. Then we fear we will lose whatever we are getting right now. But it’s healthy; there’s no point stretching things. So rip that band-aid off and see how it goes.