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If My Periods Were A Person And Other Horror Stories

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If food were a person, we would be best friends. I would hang out with food all day long, it would make me smile and we would be inseparable. It would an unbreakable friendship. You know a relationship that would not work? A friendship that would not work? That would immediately die a cruel death? If periods were a person.

I would, could potentially go to jail for murdering a person, if periods were a person. It would not be pretty. We would not be friends. We would be frenemies. I mean, I would still need her. Her coming over would mean that I am not pregnant which is important. But also, it means that my hormones are in order and all that. But when she’s here, it’s havoc. I have cramps, my back hurts, I am cranky and I am ravenous pretty much all the time.

What would your periods be if they were a person? Watch and tell us in the comments if you can relate.


Mansi Shah is the resident humour writer and random conversation starter. Tends to laugh manically at puns. Deeply enjoys the blunt force of sarcasm. Preys on chauvinists and people with incorrect grammar. Hoards makeup and beauty products. Attacks Nutella with vigour.

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