Women Talk About Female Stereotypes That Are Utter Bullshit
Years ago, I brought a little kitten home. She spent hours watching us and learning from us. Soon, she started using the washroom to do her business, preferred drinking from a glass and not a bowl. Till date, she sleeps on a pillow and requires a bedsheet, looking like a tiny hooman in a cat suit. She enjoys her methi khakra and has most qualities of a human. I think she doesn’t know she’s a cat and maybe that has a lot to do with her upbringing. Similarly, I think most women grew up with certain roles and attributes assigned to femininity and believed that’s the only way to do things. How many women struggle with having to be nurturers? Not every woman has maternal instincts. Not every woman squirts at the mere mention of makeup. But we grow up, gaslit and in an existential crisis, wondering why aren’t we like everyone else? Blame stereotypes!
Who are these women under the category of “everyone else”? Honestly, when I think of myself, I don’t feel I am not like “other women”. I am like them! These other women are smart, independent, and not a prototype model of society-fashioned femininity.
So when someone asked on Reddit which female stereotypes women were fed up with, the thread got flooded with comments!
1) Short hair doesn’t go with femininity
I have super long hair and I love them but I also really like super short hair. However, each time I think of cutting my hair, everyone advises me against it. Why is it that women who go short are looked at differently? “Oh, is she going through a heartbreak? Is she sick? Is she a lesbian?” A user wrote on female stereotypes,”I shaved my head a few times in 2 years and have had many variants of shaves (side, undercut etc) for the last 4 years, but esp after I shaved my head I got many questions if it was for CA or something like that OR i got many off hand lesbian comments/questions/enquires if I was (which I am not). I just love having short hair.”
Another woman said that she is, in fact, a lesbian, and people are surprised how she has long hair. “Haha that lesbian stereotype tho. I AM a lesbian, but with long hair. When I first came out to my friends as a teenager they were like “When are you going to cut your hair short??” Lol I knew they meant nothing bad by it, but they didn’t realise that I was exactly the same person and wasn’t going to change my style or hair or personality just because I liked girls instead of boys,” she wrote. Such dumbfuckery!
2) We just want romance and flowers
Okay, I love flowers and floral patterns. But if you want to spend 1500 bucks on me, don’t send me flowers, come over with a few cans of beer, a box of pizza and your delicious company. That’s my idea of romance. “The whole ‘we expect you to humour us, pamper us, treat us like a queen and read our minds!” and “even if we say this OK women neeeeeeed romance and flowers” nope I don’t think this way,” a woman wrote.
“Most of them. I guess a big one is the idea that women love really cliche romantic tropes and gestures. They just make me feel awkward. My husband is a lot more romantic than I am. The most romantic thing to me was when he went to the grocery store to get me bran muffins (big preggo craving) yesterday. I’d rather have that than flowers or romantic dinners,” another woman confirmed.
3) Being a mother is your life purpose
Women who like to live a little are made to feel like bad mothers, as if we are a mixer grinder that’s not doing the one job we are created to do. “The “once you become a mum that’s your entire life” no that isn’t me. I can talk about something else other than my children. I love them, they are mine and I am insanely proud of them for just being but no, they are not my entire life,” a user wrote.
Just expecting women to be nurturers is so unfair. “Being social, liking/wanting children, being more interested in people and emotions as opposed to things, being “nurturing” or having a “motherly instinct”, and just most of them in general. I’ve never related to a lot of the traditional female gender norms,” a woman explained.
4) We’re a pro at talking about our emotions
Many of us find it difficult to do that, you know. It’s not like I am proud of it but being emotionally expressive isn’t applicable to all women. “The stereotype or belief that women are more interested in or good at talking about their emotions. I feel like I’ve read so much about it but still don’t quite understand what it means to be “emotionally available,” or “open.” I feel like I’m an open book, but other people have told me I’m super closed off and it’s hard to figure out my emotions,” a women wrote about the female stereotypes.
5) We dress for men
“The one where I care what random men think of how I look – I just don’t understand where this came from,” a user explained. We dress for ourselves, according to our waxing schedules and sometimes according to what our bestie is going to wear. Not for men, that’s such a waste of money especially if they can’t tell a shift dress from a sheath dress.
6) Women talk a lot
“I think I talk a normal amount but I know plenty of guys who can talk forever but insist that I ‘talk a lot’ the minute I open my mouth. I don’t think men realize how much they actually talk, especially on topics they know you don’t really care about but they care about,” a user pointed out. Not all women talk a lot. And not all men are quiet. Men talk a lot too!
7) Women are terrible drivers
“The fact that women are terrible drivers, I realized one thing, especially in India, normally men drives car in a family and women hardly get to drive, if u get no practice, you’ll never be a good driver. That’s how most women are not good at driving but the driving skills doesn’t depend on your gender, it depends on how much you practice and how good is ur quick decision making capabilities. This stereotype pisses me off most of the time,” a user wrote.
8) There’s no such thing as a single happy woman
“Being unable to do things alone, like go to the cinema or out for dinner (when not in lockdown, obvs). It’s like there’s something wrong with being a single woman happy with her own company. I don’t get it,” a user wrote. I do things alone! I don’t feel miserable about it. Why can’t the world let women be happy single? Such shitty stereotypes!
9) Women are not interested in technology
“I like coding and sciency stuff even if I’m not good at it, I just enjoy it. I think truck nuts are great and I want them for my car. People usually assume im male online,” a user wrote. It really depends on how little girls are brought up, right?
10) Women are mean to each other
“My friendships are not toxic or horrible, otherwise I wouldn’t be friends with them,” a user wrote. Women are amazing to each other! The kind of support my female friends and acquaintances offer is just beautiful. And men will never be able to understand that.