How To Move On From A Breakup When You Haven’t Had Closure

When you’re in a relationship, they become a major part of your daily life. Your weekends are booked with them. Your day starts and ends with their texts. You know what’s happening in their life. Suddenly, one day, they disappear from your life and you are still struggling to get a grip on the reality. Because if anything, this feels like a bad dream that you want a wake up from. In a situation of loss, we need closure. We need the answers to our why’s and how’s. More importantly, we need to express ourselves one last time and bid them goodbye. But what happens when he decides to ghost you? He becomes unavailable and refuses to give you your closure. You tried demanding it, but he’s far from being mature and empathetic. Should you drown yourself in your pain? No. You can move on, without needing anything at all from him. Here’s how you can heal yourself from a breakup when there’s been no closure.

Write a letter

You’re hurting because there’s just so much you wanted to tell them but couldn’t. Not being able to express your thoughts is suffocating, so if they aren’t ready to listen, screw them! Write your heart out in a book. This is a good exercise to initiate your healing process. Start by penning down things you forgive them for. Then move on to things you want to apologise for. And then finally, end the letter by wishing them look and bidding them goodbye. After you’re done, read it once, and tear it immediately so you don’t go through it again and again. Your heart will feel lighter and you’ll be more ready to embark on this healing journey.

Self-validate

You do not need an outside entity to heal your heart. What you need instead is strength, peace and self-love, and you need to generate these from within. Give up on the questions that are bothering you. At the end, the relationship has met its fate, and pondering over it will not resurrect it.

Don’t judge yourself

A breakup or any kind of rejection can be detrimental to our self-esteem. We may begin to feel we aren’t good enough and even lose the confidence to meet new people. Don’t put yourself through this. Treat yourself how you’d treat your best friend during her breakup. Practice affirmations. Tell yourself that you are amazing and it’s okay to be where you are right now.

Don’t fight your feelings

Denying you’re in pain won’t make it non-existent. It’s natural to feel sadness, pain, remorse etc after a breakup. Accept how you feel and then begin dealing with it. Feeling sad is okay, but drowning yourself in melancholy should be avoided. Snap out of it. Surround yourself with people who love you.

Start making new memories

We often tend to disconnect ourselves from the world when in emotional pain. Instead, allow yourself to make fresh, happy memories. This will help you detach from the memories of the past. Catch up with friends, travel, join a new activity – make every moment count.

Allow yourself to heal

Take inspiration from the boss babes of Bollywood! When Katrina Kaif broke up with Ranbir, she seemed to turn a new leaf in her life. She focused on getting fitter and even joined Instagram! Stuffing yourself with food and alcohol will not heal you. Invest in healthier habits like trying a fitness form or learning a new skill.

Seek help if you must

All of us are different and we deal with heartbreaks in our own way. Don’t feel hesitant to seek help from an expert if you feel you need it. Take a cue from Dear Zindagi and visit a dimaag ka doctor to deal with unresolved issues in your life.