8 Real World Things Desi Moms Should Teach Daughters Instead Of “Beta, Adjust Kar Lo”

“Beta, adjust kar lo,” is the mantra that a lot of desi moms chant to their daughters. They may not say it in so many words, but that’s the message we are being given when we are told not to be too ambitious. Or when we are asked to move cities to follow our husbands so they can follow their dreams, or put up with questionable behaviour from relatives. But, instead of teaching us to become furniture that can be relocated as it pleases the people in the house, desi mothers should be teaching these 8 things. These real life lessons that can help us deal with the world, the challenges we might face and may be, instead of adjusting, we will make our own place in the world.

How to deal with lecherous men… on the streets, in public transport, in our school and work, and at home.

How to take care of our health, especially sexual health. It goes beyond monitoring our periods, and involves safe sex, PAP smears and STD tests. But, our mothers don’t tell us this, do they?

How to say no! To a friend, a boss, a lover, or even a parent!

How to voice our opinions, regardless of who the audience is. Why should we have to sit quietly in the name of politeness when a family member says or does something offensive? Or, anybody, for that matter. Why should we not put our thoughts across, without feeling bad about it?

How to save money. Nobody is born with an innate talent for saving money. It’s a skill we learn, and it can single-handedly make our lives better.

How to tell the difference between kindness and emotional manipulation. Because, there’s honestly no person better than our mother to teach us this!

How to keep ourselves safe in public. Does carrying a Swiss knife really help? Must we always be chaperoned? What are the red flags?

How to be alone. When a woman can be okay alone, by herself, she becomes invaluable to whoever she lets into her life!