5 Signs You Need To Expand Your Definition Of Love. It’ll Change Your Dating Life!
For the longest time, people thought the earth was flat and nobody bought the whole theory of it being round. And now that it’s no more theory but a fact, you will still find some people who will refuse to leave their school of thought. In fact, imagine if someone tells you that earth is not round but oval, none of us will buy that. We are stubborn in our perception and even more so when it comes to matters of the heart. We’re so hell-bent on our brand of love that nothing else just will get our authenticity seal.
For once, we might begin to question time and the magical realism in Netflix’s Dark and even do a Google search if time travel is possible. But ask us to change our definition of love, and we’ll give them Priyanka Chopra’s “aapne toh humse hamaara ghuroor chheen liya”. So is there any harm in expanding our definition of love? I know I used to be very persistent in my version until I realised that I am limiting myself. And believe me, it will only bring you more love and better relationship satisfaction. Here are signs that you too need to widen your horizons when it comes to love.
1) You always fall for the same kind of men
I used to fall for those with emotional damage – I don’t know why – maybe they appealed to my inherent need to nurture. Or maybe I subconsciously knew that those wouldn’t work out in the long run and so my commitment phobic self was drawn to them. Maybe I like the thrill of a doomed romance. If you too have a pattern that’s not quite healthy for you, then I guess it will help if you break it. I always saw love as this rush of passion but maybe we’re just horny? Maybe love is that feeling of calm. Maybe it is not having to fight for it. Who knows?
2) It disappoints you when you don’t feel loved in the way you want
What do you usually fight over when it comes to your current or ex-partner? If it all boils down to having a different love language than you, then maybe it’s time to become multi-lingual. You have certain notions of how people behave in love and when someone doesn’t behave that way, you feel like they don’t love you enough. But they do, in the way they know to love. And that’s not wrong either. Honestly, even a guy who is your soulmate will not share exactly the same love language. There will be some differences in expression and we just have to accept that.
3) You always feel something is missing and nobody fits
It’s like you keep seeking the kind of love you want and yet, what you find is the bitter taste of disappointment. Now most men are disappointing; I won’t give you an over-optimistic view. But sometimes the reason why nobody fits is that the space is too small. Once you expand your view of what is attractive and what love is, everyone won’t feel like a misfit.
4) You’re beginning to lose faith in love
This is the biggest warning! Love is beautiful and we all need it. But bad experiences make us detest it or scared of it. But all of this will change when you reset your button and look at it from a fresh angle. Right now it may look like a selfie from a lower angle where all you can see is your double chin. But wait till you see it from a different view that highlights your cheeks and slims your jawline!
5) You might be pleasantly surprised by dating outside your type
With expanding what you see as love, you expand the kind of people you date. Clearly, your type so far hasn’t done you any good. But when you date outside your type, you might realise that this wasn’t what you wanted but what you needed all this while. Maybe what you had been prioritising wasn’t so much of a priority?