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Relationships

5 Signs You Are The Problem In Your Relationship

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It comes naturally to many of us to blame others for the problems in our life. Especially in matters of the heart, we love to point fingers and play what is infamously called the “blame game”. But, many relationships could be saved if we took cognisance of our own contribution to the problems at hand. Here are 5 signs you may be the problem in your relationship:

1. You find the same problem in every relationship you’re in

Do you find that every person you’re with thinks ill-tempered, or impatient, or some other roadblock you come across? If so, it’s more a reflection of you than anything else. It’s a pattern you have, and only you can break it.

2. You never think you are or could be wrong

It’s always the other person’s fault. It’s always something they said or did. The thought that it could have been you doesn’t occur to you because you’re perfect. Or, are you?

3. You feel like the victim in the relationship

People are victimised by abusive partners more often than they should be. This is a reality. But, being victimised is not always the same as feeling like the victim. If you feel like it most of the time in your relationship, take stock if what is happening that is making you feel this way. If you are in an abusive relationship, ask yourself, why you’re here? If not, then, what’s the victim card about?

4. It’s either your way or the highway

Compromise and middle ground is the grain of a good relationship. If you don’t strive to find the middle ground, and expect your partner to do things your way all the time, then that’s unfair, and that’s on you.

5. Your friends and family tell you so

Your friends and family will always be by your side, even when you may be wrong. But, they will tell you when you are at fault. It’s not because they don’t understand you, or don’t care about you. On the contrary, they see your patterns as outsiders who are deeply invested in your well-being, and if they point out something, then know that it’s for your benefit.

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