Netherlands Is Advising Its Citizens To Have Sex And Cuddle Buddies. Meanwhile, We Are Regrowing Our Virginity In This Lockdown.
When all of this started for us in March, none of us anticipated this would last that long. So for us, it was just a few weeks of staying apart from bae. Even if you’re single, it just meant you would not hook up with someone or have the possibility of dating the cutie you’ve been talking to. But now it seems like this is going to go on for long enough to feel like an eternity. Actually, it actually has.
And I know this isn’t the top of national concerns but sex is important. In fact, considering how it sells so much, it seems pretty much essential. But here we are, with a lockdown on our sex lives too because unless you’re actually married to or living in with your beau, it’s going to be dry this year.
However, the Netherlands, known for its high happiness quotient and open culture, is actually advising its citizens on matters of sex. Since the world has accepted that coronavirus is going to be around for a long, long time, the government doesn’t want citizens to regrow their virginity. Considering how sex does improve both physical and mental health, the Netherlands has asked its citizens to have sex buddies if they are single. Never had I imagined that this would be advice coming from a government body and not my friend whose advice always lands me in trouble.
When you’re in Quarantine and realize you should’ve fucked one more time pic.twitter.com/Qm9OOykMo7
— IZZY (@izzyreyes___) March 15, 2020
The Dutch National Institute for Public Health and the Environment (RIVM) gave out some sex advice for both couples and singles, as reported by The Guardian. “Sex with your regular partner is possible if you want both. After all, you are already very close and it is practically impossible to avoid each other physically. Don’t have sex with your partner if they have been isolated because of (suspected) coronavirus infection. Sex with yourself or with others at a distance is possible (think of telling erotic stories, masturbating together),” said the advisory.
And those who are not partnered need not be parched either. “It makes sense that as a single you also want to have physical contact. Discuss how best to do this together. For example, meet with the same person to have physical or sexual contact (for example, a cuddle buddy or ‘sex buddy’), provided you are free of illness. Make good arrangements with this person about how many other people you both see. The more people you see, the greater the chance of (spreading) the coronavirus,” said the advisory as quoted by BBC. While we have been advised to be aatma nirbhar.
things i’ve done this quarantine:
-fuck up my sleep schedule
— ✞ (@domslutt) March 24, 2020
ALSO READ: You’re Not Masturbating, You’re Being “Aatma Nirbhar” In This Lockdown And Even The PM Says This Is The Way To Go
Only if that was possible in India! Indian parents are like ‘What sexual desires? Shameless girl, pray to God instead!’ So while people in the Netherlands will be making sex and cuddle buddies, our culture considers pre-marital sex a sin. A place where your character is judged on the basis of your sexual history – and if there is any, then you’re loose – I don’t see any possibility of this happening. You may not hear it from the government, and if you live with your parents, masturbation is going to be a way of life for you. I bet this is the happiest time for our parents.