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Anu Malik Steps Down From Indian Idol To Clean His Name. We Take Some Guesses About Where To Find Him

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I’ve realised that when you’re working for a publication that is known to further feminism and not afraid to call out people on the kind of rubbish they plan on passing off as acceptable, there are quite a number of times that you’re accused of not taking people seriously for their words, and by ‘people’ they mean the men, for when they shout off of rooftops of their ‘innocence’ in this world of #MeToo. And we’d give it to them, we generally don’t. We are kind of guilty of having a ridiculously low threshold for crap and often choose to ignore such antics that stink of lies. But, to bring in a change, we’ve decided to give the men a real chance and we do that by start taking them for their words. Literally, too.

And the first one on our list is the #MeToo accused singer and composer Anu Malik, who had been called out by singers like Neha Bhasin and Shweta Pandit for his sexual misconduct and inappropriate advances. Having been trending for a while now, ever since he was seen back on the show Indian Idol as a judge, even after several reports of his sexual misdemeanor floating around. The guy hasn’t been let off the hook by netizens and mainly Sona Mohapatra and we are glad. He, however still maintains his statement of not being guilty and has recently made a statement that we have decided to take very seriously.

Also Read : Anu Malik’s Tweet Addressing The #MeToo Allegations Is A Lame Attempt At Getting Off The Hook. Sona Mohapatra Isn’t Having Any Of It. Thank God!

Talking about stepping down from his position as a judge, he said, “I have not quit the show. I have taken a three-week break. I want to clear my name and return to the show. If someone is saying things about me again and again on social media, it gets to you. I wrote an Insta post explaining that I am in a dark space. This Twitter campaign has been going on since a while and I was tired of these false, malicious accusations on social media. The best thing is once you clear your name and go back to business, it is good for everyone.” And we just have one question, where does a man like him go to clear his name? Where does garbage actually go for cleaning? And we may have 5 very possible places we might run into him, if clearing his name is what he is going for –

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A Laundromat

Known to be a place where people often come to clean the daag on their chunri, a laundromat had to be our first guess, considering Anu Malik has quite a few stains he needs to clean up before he can wave a clean chit in front of the public. Because as much as we’re told daag acche hain, the ones he is in possession of definitely aren’t one of those. Guess that harassment hat is due for some good old cleaning.

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A Sink

The nearest place we can envision him to run off to especially at a time when he finds himself in a tough and dirty spot is the sink. Because his spirit may be soaring and his career may be afloat but there is a big possibility his ship is going to sink instead.  I am hoping for a Titanic-esque wreckage situation.

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The best place to get yourself clean after  you’ve gone through the various stages is rehab. And if we know one thing for sure, that Anu Malik has been in denial, then outraged, then sad. The kind of thing you would want to seek help for. And maybe a detox is what he will be going for, to keep himself from all the lying and further overdosing on the innocence of young and impressionable girls.

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A Recycle Plant

Because that is considerably the best place to re-add value to a piece of trash. Now, don’t get us wrong, considering that Anu Malik definitely plans on making his comeback, it is best he does it after turning himself into a more organic, sustainable and socially acceptable, hopefully better human being.

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One of the largest pilgrimage site in our country, a sacred ghat where people often go to wash their selves of the sins they have committed, for a cleaner heart and cleaner conscience. We could bet on the probability of running into the accused perpetrator at the ghat doing his paapon ka praashchit and coming back a reformed man. Or maybe floating into oblivion. We would pick the second option in a heartbeat.

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A Dhobi Ghat

A dhobi ghat is similar to a laundromat but different in that you wash your dirty linen in public here. Now, Anu Malik doesn’t just have your run-of-the-mill load of washing to do. We are stains of misconduct, false cries and wanting pity – yeah, those don’t wash easy. He’s going to be here a long, long time.

MeToo Accused Anu Malik Is Back As A Judge On Indian Idol. Sona Mohapatra Is Irate And We’re Disappointed


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