Break Up Or Fix It But Don’t Make These Mistakes When Your Relationship Isn’t Working Out
We see love as a matter of heart, which it primarily is. It’s like we wait to meet someone who’d make us forget all logic and reasoning, who would give us love that may be inconvenient but so passionate. We don’t care about anything else, as long as they make our hearts sing. While in the relationship, we let our emotions take over. When he is talking to a gorgeous girl, you feel jealous. When he couldn’t call you because he was busy with work, all you see is the fact that you missed him. Even he takes the hat of rationality off his head and throws it in the air like you don’t need it in love.
But here’s the thing, acting out completely based on your emotions can create problems in your relationship. Emotional intelligence and knowing what to do in certain situations will help you much more than simply following your feelings. So when things aren’t going well, you may feel like lashing out at him. When you feel you’re not getting enough attention, you may be tempted to speak to the guy who is willing to. Or simply play the blame game when your ego feels too bruised to accept feedback. Both of you can be indulging in these definitely not well thought out actions, and just deepening the damage in your relationship.
So I say, either break up or fix it but do not do these stupid things when your relationship isn’t going well. It will only make things ugly and ruin your peace of mind.
1) Taking interest in other guys
Your relationship is vulnerable and if you start spending time with another guy, it is just a matter of time before it shatters. The new guy makes you feel so good because of the novelty and the fact that he is still trying to woo you. So you will inevitably compare and feel like he has what you truly want until you realise much later that he either never intended to commit or things won’t always be rosy with him either. So stay with your current, if you want to fix things. Or break up and move to the next.
2) Trying your best to hurt each other
The satisfaction you feel when you upload a selfie with a hottie on Instagram to make him J? Or when you adulterate each other’s happy moments with taunts? That’s nothing to be proud of. In fact, it’s stupid and probably the last thing either of you’ll need. Clear your heart of the resentment and just communicate. Addressing what really bothers you is the adult thing to do and not trying to hurt each other.
3) Constantly playing the blame game
All that resentment is clouding your rationality. Remember, this is not an ego battle but more importantly, you’re supposed to be on the same side of the fence. There are problems and both people have a role to play in resolving those problems. Most importantly, we need to make sure we don’t get carried away and start blaming each other for everything. We need to give and accept feedback through honest communication, so this doesn’t look like an ugly spat between two teenagers.
4) Sending mixed messages
One moment you act as though you care and you want this to work. Next, you feel like you don’t want to be the one showing more care or looking too desperate. Between saying kind things and then taking them back, what do you truly want? Find the answer and stick to it.
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5) Bitching about each other to family and best friends
Yeah, sure you have so much in your heart but why don’t you simply pour it out to him? Bitching about him will only make your folks and your friends hate him and since they have heard only your side, they won’t be able to give you an unbiased opinion.