5 Reasons Women Should Date Multiple Guys. Mainly Because, Don’t Put All Your Eggs In One Basket
It was only after my long-term love affair decided to go away, get engaged to another woman while whispering sweet nothings to me on the other hand that I decided to explore the dating field and date multiple guys because fuck it. I won’t deny it, it was earth, self-esteem and everything-shattering phase and my alcohol dependency was a little more than pleasant. At some point, I wondered if the bartender at my neighbourhood bar thought I was stalking him. No honey, I was drowning my sorrows in the many drinks of vodka because I am dramatic and that was my way of dealing with sadness. Thankfully, I don’t believe in that kind of escapism anymore.
But between stumbling home drunk and arriving to work sleep deprived, I decided to date again. Bad idea but well, I was full of that “fuck that shit I am gonna see other guys” emotion. There I went, navigating through the dating pool and in that phase – which was the sluttiest phase of my life – I dated a few good-looking, smart, intelligent and funny men.
I was smart and knew where to draw the line, keeping my comfort zone in mind. Nobody was being led on and it was just basically going on dates, having a good time. But damn, it was exciting! I got over my ex. Okay, no. But I did get over thinking that romantic feelings won’t happen again. I was oozing confidence and whipping my hair, dressing up because I felt like it.
No, I am not saying your confidence should come from dating men. But there’s no harm in feeling in control of things, right? Or do you not have such desires of being in charge of your life? I was open to relationships and one of them did make it. Of course, I stopped dating other guys then (unless you are non-monogamous!)
That phase is done and dusted. I would still say a single woman who is interested in dating must date multiple guys, at least in the initial stage. Do not keep all your eggs in one basket. Here’s why.
You won’t get carried away with all that dopamine rush from one man
Dopamine is a brain chemical that is released in our brain when it rewards us for something that feels so damn good – like when a cutie serenades you on a date. You love the attention, so you feel like meeting the source of it again and it feels nothing short of an addiction. So there you are, getting fooled by the dopamine rush which tends to come under the guise of feelings of amore. Calm down, woman. This logic numbing chemical will also make you blind towards his flaws and imperfections. He may be an over-jealous guy and you’ll go like, aww he’s so cute and possessive. Nope. Meeting and dating several guys will keep your feet on the ground and your head out of the cloud of all the sweet nothings he tells you.
You can compare and figure what attributes work for you
Most of us tend to stick to a type. Mine? It used to be the damaged, broken men with intimacy issues with just a tad bit of narcissistic tendencies. Well, of course, I had to stop dating those men for the sake of my sanity and self-respect. And now, I am single because the attributes I like are hard to find. However, it’s good to go out with a couple of men from different walks of life – the creative type, the intellectual, the goofball, and the mandatory fuckboi. It will be a time of self-realisation as you will understand what works for you, what doesn’t, and what is an absolute dealbreaker!
Dating multiple guys will boost your confidence
Beauty leads to more beauty! What I mean to say is only if you are able to see the beauty in you that you will want to grow it further. And I am not talking about just your looks. You will radiate confidence because you know you are a person of worth and substance. And that will make you want to invest more in your personal growth. You never know who you meet and how they touch your life. Even a small gesture of encouragement goes a long way to heal a gaslit heart!
Your dating skills will improve
You know how they say practice makes you perfect. It’s good to be out there, understanding the rules and trends of how dating works. In fact, it gives you a picture of different kinds of men and the way they think. You will be able to handle it better and also know how to preserve yourself. So date multiple guys if you must. Don’t worry about what society says.
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You will be stronger to deal with “letting go”
When you are in the dating pool, not every guy who you supposedly had a good date with calls back. You may get ghosted. Or eventually, when the love drug wears off, you may realise that he lives like a 19-year-old who has just moved out of his parents’. Whatever it is, you will make peace with the fact that things don’t always turn out the way you expected. The reality check is great!