5 Reasons It’s Better To Be Single Than With Someone Who Doesn’t Value You
When I started writing professionally, I didn’t know so many things that I know now. Be it related to my craft or to the way things work, in fact even developing soft skills that make things easier – I didn’t know so much back then. But I had this undying hunger to learn and grow so I can be better equipped to work in this profession. Similarly, when I started dating for the first time, I knew nothing about relationships. I actually thought I would end up with that person forever and that love is enough for it to last.
Today, having made it out alive of as many relationships as the number of places I have worked at, I can say my personal growth hasn’t been left out. With experience comes wisdom so I can say I have a much better understanding of self and relationships. In fact, what is the very core of relationships? It’s all about the way you perceive yourself. Having been in a bad relationship myself, I know how much that affected my sense of self-worth and that’s really the last thing anyone would want. And if you chose to walk out of that narcissistic relationship to be on your own, you’ve done the right thing. Here’s why it’s so much better to be single than be with someone who doesn’t deserve you.
1) You may not have a partner but you have peace of mind
I know sometimes it gets lonely and most of us are too embarrassed to even admit that. We want to pretend to be strong all the time and somehow admitting that we crave human connection makes us sound weak. But you may not have a partner but you are at peace. You’re not being made to feel small every other day. You’re not begging for someone’s attention. This gives you the mental bandwidth to actually focus on things that matter.
2) It hurts more to feel alone when you’re in a relationship
Again, I am saying this from experience. I actually learnt to be on my own while I was still in a relationship because I felt so alone. He was really not there and it was like we were in a relationship but just for his benefit. So I discarded it and I am still alone, but at least my real and official relationship status are the same. Being with such men feels like masturbation, you feel like you’re the only one making you happy.
3) It’s important to love yourself and not accept anything less than what you deserve
A lot of us try to stick it out even in toxic relationships because we think that’s what love is all about. We’re trying to prove that our love is strong and resilient. We are hoping that they will see how much we love them and change. Cut it out, sis! If you love yourself, you won’t stay with someone who treats you badly. Be your own best friend and advise yourself to never settle for anything less than the love you truly deserve.
4) You’ve vacated the spot so someone deserving can occupy it
You can’t get hired if there’s no vacancy, right? Similarly, how will you welcome the love of your life if that spot is occupied by Mr. Crapbag? If you’re single RN, you’ve successfully taken the garbage out and de-cluttered your heart. Someone amazing is right around the corner.
ALSO READ: I Am Single Not Because I Don’t Want Love But Because I Have Been Disappointed Too Many Times
5) You can use this time to heal yourself
Meanwhile, being single helps you heal from all the past relationships and damage. We may forget them but sometimes, the damage takes a while to be reversed. You could still be carrying baggage from a previous relationship and not necessarily just the most recent one. Being single will help you focus on yourself and heal before you can gather energy to kiss some more frogs until you find your cutie.