10 Selfish Reasons Ex-Lovers Try To Slide Back In Your Life
I once dated this guy and he didn’t like the fact that I was in touch with my ex. He made sure that he didn’t stay in touch with his, like he is not in touch with me now. Honestly, I didn’t understand it back then and saw no harm in it. I thought, what’s wrong with being friends with your ex? I still say, there’s nothing wrong with that but only a few people can pull it off. Like right now, out of all the guys I dated or had a romantic connection with, I am friends with one or two people. Actually, I can’t even call them my friends; they are just acquaintances. And that’s only because we are over it and can handle it.
I don’t like it when an ex starts off with just being friends with you and then goes on to try and slide back in your life, with a changed status, trying to see if there’s something there. If you want it too, it’s great but usually I am the kind who doesn’t give up easily and when I do, he’s gone for good. Breaking up isn’t easy, and being in a bad relationship is even tougher. You’ve endured and fought so much for your peace of mind, which he wants to perforate for selfish reasons. Even if you don’t give it a chance, it gets complicated and messes with your head. Do we want that? Nope. Here are some selfish reasons he’s trying to come back into your life.
1) He dated again and it sucked
It’s likely that he dived head first into the bed with a girl who didn’t treat him as nicely as you did. When the initial attraction wore off, he realised that you were really nice, even with all those quirks. Maybe she kicked his ass and now he wants you to heal his ego for him.
2) Lack of options
You remember when you graduated from college and you were so full of hope and promise? You thought the world is your oyster and hiring managers will come flocking to you owing to the amazing resume you made yourself. And then, of course your rose-tinted purview of things led you to the underpaying job you are in right now. Similarly, the dating profile he created got him no good matches and here he is, out of options and cunningly sliding back into your life.
3) He is lonely
He doesn’t need you; he needs someone or something to fill the void in his shallow existence. If he learns to be happy alone or has a hectic work schedule, would he even bother to call you? He has a blank space baby, and he wants to write your name. Don’t fall for that!
4) He misses the sex
If the sex was good, I would miss it too but it doesn’t give you the right to play with someone’s feelings for that. Maybe he just wants to feel your warmth again. But once he has that, he’ll be running saying it’s too much to bear!
5) Out of habit
Habits are really difficult to break. It’s possible that he is just used to you. Netflix nights, dancing nights, Sunday brunches, etc. how do you snap out of such good habits? Just feel proud that you are that addictive and move on!
6) He misses the attention
Honestly, even I miss that. Being single is tough; you’re used to having a partner and then suddenly all that attention is taken away, even if it wasn’t much. I miss being wished good morning with an ‘I love you’. I miss all of that but I won’t intoxicate my ex’s life just for my thirst for attention. Ask him to get his dose from elsewhere.
7) You moved on and it hurt his ego
Somehow, all that time you spent fighting for your relationship made them feel validated. They felt they were worth so much and now that you stopped giving a fuck, it hurt their ego. If you felt so responsible for his ego, you’d still be in a relationship with him. But it’s not your problem, so let him deal with it, on his own.
8) He likes the chase
Does this remind you of the time when he was wanted you? And then once he had you, he relaxed. Now that you’re gone again, he is trying to slide into your life because he is one of those people who value something only when it’s not theirs. He enjoys the chase and will want that high again.
9) It was convenient
You know it takes a lot of effort to find a new girl and then chase her and get her to fall for you. Why put so much effort when he can just recycle an old relationship? Maybe it’s convenient for him to date you. Don’t fall for this!
10) He doesn’t want a failed relationship
When a relationship breaks, everyone around you ask what went wrong. Over time you form the same social circle and when you part ways, how do you manage that? He just doesn’t want to go through the pressure of a broken relationship!